3.5 stars
Date of review: May 17, 2024
This book is an important read about boundaries, providing great analogies, examples, and practice templates for boundary setting in various different contexts. While Elman’s words will definitely resonate with many, I found the general tone of her book a bit too individualistic for my taste. For example, a collaborative attitude to boundary setting in trusting relationships was not really the focus; instead, a pretty one-sided, no-discussion approach was championed (which may work in some contexts, but equally, might not always be a necessary or healthy approach). The language was peppered with ‘shoulds’, whereas I believe that boundaries are not a one-size-fits-all issue. I also found that whilst lots of chapters covered themes that were sometimes only loosely related to the main topic, an opportunity was missed to talk about the very relevant connection between boundaries and privilege, such as financial privilege, the privilege of being in relationships whereby setting boundaries won’t result in danger etc. All in all, however, this is a book I think about a lot, and it would be a helpful read for anyone looking to improve their own understanding of or skills related to boundaries.
The Joy of Being Selfish by Michelle Elman is available to purchase on World of Books.
